Active TopicsActive Topics  Display List of Forum MembersMemberlist  Search The ForumSearch  HelpHelp    RegisterRegister  LoginLogin
On the web
 *O.B.C* - Forum : The *O.B.C* Forums : On the web
Message Icon Topic: Greatest product review ever Post Reply Post New Topic
Author Message
Sith
*O.B.C*Team Member
*O.B.C*Team Member
Avatar

Joined: July 31 2004
Location: Ireland
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 3994
Quote Sith Replybullet Topic: Greatest product review ever
    Posted: November 25 2013 at 9:07pm
I was looking at potential gift ideas for Christmas on Amazon and found this review for an electric razor/groomer and very quickly found myself falling off my chair laughing - enjoy!

63 of 71 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars A great ball-bag and arse hair trimmer- but think of the consequences before you get carried away! 24 May 2012
By Wayne Redhart TOP 1000 REVIEWER VINE VOICE

Amazon Vine Review:

Downstairs grooming is not something that I had granted prior consideration to the thought of ever attempting- but it would have seemed silly to turn down the opportunity to explore new horizons.

I was initially a little tentative about the potential perils of excavating my crack with buzzing machinery but (with mind and buttocks alike becoming progressively more open) I was soon waving the thing around with a positively gay level of abandon.

Although I had doubted whether there might be anything significant to differentiate between this and the side-burn trimmer of a regular shaver, the thin teeth really do allow for confidence. Indeed, after just a brief experiment with my shaver, opaque red liquid was to flow freely from a small breach to the scrotal hull. Returning to this device, not even the most haphazard of technique was able to bring about a secondary source of blood letting- although there's not a hope in hell that I'd be persuaded to use the Gillette blades down there! The clippers couple a more than close enough shave, with a good deal more peace of mind- compared to a giant cluster of razors.

Anyway, since grooming, things are feeling pretty good and the benefits continue to accumulate. Post-defecatory wiping is easier to perform and places considerably fewer demands upon the earth's resources, in order to finish the job. There's something quite liberating about the way paper glides across a smoothed surface (although, when in public, you'll need to be wary of how resolutely the act of breaking wind can project around a crowded lift, say- without the aid of nature's resonance-damping muffler). It's also far easier to dry oneself after a shower, once those last few stubborn pockets of moisture have been robbed of their usual foothold. My bottle of talcum powder has since become little more than an obsolete relic of times gone by.

However, I could not personally recommend giving yourself the full works, down below. Personally, I made a point of retaining an adequate old tuft, like a kind of pubic fringe. After all, where else are you supposed to produce/store a thick soapy foam, that can be transferred about the rest of the body during a shower? Perhaps the current popularity of the fully shaven look explains why one sees so many of those puffy washing thingies (that they attach to bits of string), these days. However, I'd sooner be at the helm of a traditional pubically generated lather, any day of the week.

EDIT- I've been wondering about the issue of skid-marks. Being hairless means that you don't have to worry about inadvertently smearing dirty leftovers into your anal beard (which can be a particular problem if you're in the habit of failing to answer a call of nature, before having already allowed the "turtle's head" to poke through). As most chaps will know, on a sweaty summer's day this can turn the stragglers into a dangerous time-release mechanism, that slowly but surely offloads its contents into the fabric of your underwear. However, assuming that you are able to ensure cleanliness of your hairs after passing a stool- maybe it could equally serve as a impenetrable barrier between potential anal seepages and pants? The results have been inconclusive so far, but I've just ordered a job-lot of white Y-fronts for the sake of further research.

Only Now, At The End Do You Understand.
IP IP Logged
Dantheman5187
*O.B.C*Team Member
*O.B.C*Team Member
Avatar
Married to my best friend.

Joined: June 05 2004
Location: United States
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 1686
Quote Dantheman5187 Replybullet Posted: November 26 2013 at 3:12pm
BAHAHAHAHA this is amazing!  LOLLOLLOLLOLLOLLOLLOL
*O.B.C.j*Dan_the_Man

Avatar by Ahren from plognark.com
*RIP* Kevin
IP IP Logged
Jim13
*O.B.C*Team Member
*O.B.C*Team Member
Avatar

Joined: April 21 2008
Location: United States
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 567
Quote Jim13 Replybullet Posted: November 26 2013 at 5:34pm
hahaha Scrotal Hull hahahaha
Eat Well
Laugh Often
Live Life
IP IP Logged
X O.B.C Member
*Forum Stalker*
*Forum Stalker*
Avatar
Communist Pinko

Joined: September 29 2008
Location: Zimbabwe
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 3451
Quote X O.B.C Member Replybullet Posted: November 30 2013 at 3:47pm
The microphone explodes, shattering the molds Either drop tha hits like de la O or get tha f**k off tha commode Wit tha sure shot, sure ta make tha bodies drop

Bulls on parade!


IP IP Logged
OBC RAT PATROL
Groupie*
Groupie*


Joined: September 26 2007
Location: Canada
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 68
Quote OBC RAT PATROL Replybullet Posted: December 03 2013 at 8:56pm
Lol,
Steady Eddie
IP IP Logged
Post Reply Post New Topic
Printable version Printable version

Forum Jump
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot create polls in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum



This page was generated in 0.063 seconds.