Oh my....this thread keeps getting better and better.

1) Why is the Afghan air force so easy to train?

You only have to teach them how to take off!

2) What do you call a peice of sandpaper in Afghanistan?

A map!

3) Failed Afghan recruitment slogans:

Be Allah you can be!
Martyrs have more fun!
Free camoflage turbans! Sign up today!
Uncle oSAMa wants you! (Now you know that was funny)

4) What do you call a guy with his hand up a camels ass?

An Afghani mechanic!

5) Why don't they teach Drivers Ed. and Sex Ed. on the same day in the middle east?

The camels would get too tired!

6) What's 20 feet long and wrapped around a c**t?

A turban!

7) What should Iraq get for it's air defence system?

A refund!

8) What do you get if you put 30 Iraqi women in a bomb shelter?

A full set of teeth!

9) What's the difference between an Arab an ET?

ET went home!

10) Have you seen the new Iraqi Flag?

A white star on a white background!

Q: What do female Muslims use for birth control?
A: Their faces. [See photo above.]

Q: What's the difference between a Muslim and a dead horse?
A. It's no fun beating a dead horse.

Q. What's the difference between an American BBQ and an Islamic BBQ?
A. In America, Humans roast animals over a fire. In Islam, it's the other way around.

Q. What do you say to a Muslim with his arm all the way up a camel's rump?
A. "Having car trouble?"

Q. What's the difference between Cindy Sheehan and a terrorist enemy?
A. I don't know either.

Q. What's the difference between Michael Moore and a one ton CARE package?
A. Michael Moore, if sliced real thin, can feed a larger Afghan village.

A Pakistani comes to America and begins working for the ACLU but is unfamiliar with American advances in toiletry. On his first day on the job he comes back from the men's room saying he can't find any hole in the ground. His boss explains how American plumbing works and sends the Pakistani back.

A few minutes later, a loud, blood-curdling scream is heard from the bathroom. A few minutes after that, another loud scream shakes the office walls. His boss runs into the bathroom to investigate why he's screaming.

mop bucketThe Pakistani replies, "I am just sitting here on the toilet like you instructed to do and every time I am making to flush, something comes up and squeezes dearly on my poor testicles."

His boss looks at what he's sitting on and says, "You idiot. You're sitting on the mop bucket!"

A Muslim father catches his son masturbating. He says, "Don't do that my son, or Allah will strike you blind." The child says, "Abu, I'm over here."

Q: How do you get a Muslim woman pregnant?
A: Dress her up as a goat.

Did you hear the one about the Muslim who won a Nobel Prize in Mathematics?
Neither did I.

Q. How many muslims does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
A. What's toilet paper?

Q. What do Muslim men do during foreplay?
A. Tickle the goat under the chin.

Here are a few tasteless jokes even al-Qaeda can appreciate:

Q. How many Muslim extremists will it take to destroy America?
A. None, American Liberals can do it all by themselves, thank you.

Did you hear about the prostitute who came out of a bar and was stoned? She didn't survive.

Did you hear about the greatest bash they ever had in Bali? Everyone was bombed. (this last one makes Bin Laden roll on the floor, piss in his robe, and kiss his goat)

    Mohammed heard one of his wives was leaving him, so he rushed home where he found her on the carpet in front of the tent with her belongings; he sat beside her and said, “I heard you were planning to leave me?”

    She replied, “Yes, I heard your other wives saying you were a pedophile!”

    Mohammed thinks for a minute or so and then responds, “that's a mighty big word for a 6 year old."

Q. What do you call a Muslim who owns a camel and a goat?
A. Bisexual.

Q. How do Muslims practice safe sex?
A. They mark the camels that kick.

Q. What do Tehran and Hiroshima have in common?
A. Nothing, yet.

Q. What do you call a Muslim who owns 6 goats?
A. A pimp.

Q. whats the difference between a truck full of dead Muslim babies and a truck full of bowling balls?
A. The bowling bowls are hard to pick up with a pitchfork.

Q: How do you tell a Sunni from a Shiite?
A: The Sunnis are the ones with the Shiite blown out of them.

Q. What's the hardest part about a Muslim killing his own daughter?
A. Suppressing the erection.

Q: How can you tell if a Muslim girl is old enough to marry?
A: Make her stand in a barrel. If her chin is over the top, she's old enough. If it isn't, cut the barrel down until her chin is over the top.

Q. What's the difference between a Muslim and a vampire?
A. At some point the vampire will stop being bloodthirsty.

    A Muslim walks into his local mosque with a big grin on his face.

    "What are you so happy about, Abdul?" Asks the Imam.

    "Well, I'll tell you," replies Abdul. "I live by the railroad tracks and on my way home last night, I noticed a young woman tied to the rails, like in the American movies. I cut her free and took her back to my humble abode. Allah be praised - we made love all night, all around the tent. We did everything, me on top, sometimes her on top, every position permitted by Mohammed, Peace Be Upon Him!"

    "By the most Merciful," exclaimed the Imam, "you have been blessed. Was she as beautiful as a desert flower?"

    Abdul grimaced, "By the Jinn, I do not know - I never found her head."

Q. What's the difference between ET and Muslims?
A. ET got the point and went home.

I went to a Muslim birthday party last night. Damn if that wasn't the fastest game of Hot Potato I've ever seen!

Q. Why are there only 2 pallbearers at a Muslim funeral?
A. There's only 2 handles on a garbage can.

Q. What do you say to a Pakistani at Christmas?
A. A quart of milk, a loaf of bread and a pack of Marlboros please.

Q. What do you call a bus with 2 Somalis falling off a cliff?
A. A waste, you could have fit at least 50 in the bus!

Q. What do you call a Muslim between two houses?
A. Ali.

Q. When's the only time you should wink at a Muslim?
A. When aiming.
NewsFlash

Reports say the stench from the thousands of bodies in Pakistan is unbearable. Police report that it's likely to get worse now that there are dead ones.

Q. What can Saudi Arabia do to raise the average IQ in the country?
A. Allow Jews to come in.

    A Russian, a Cuban, an Englishman and a Pakistani are on a train.

    The Russian takes out a bottle of his best vodka, drinks a bit and throws the rest off the train and says, "There's plenty more of that where I come from."

    Everyone is impressed. The Cuban takes out one of the finest Havana cigars, takes one puff and throws it off the train and says, "There's plenty more of those where I come from."

    Again everyone is rather impressed. So the Englishman stands up and throws the Pakistani off the train.

Q: Where do you find a Muslim with no legs?
A: Right where you left him.

Q: What's the difference between Dar al-islam and Dannon yogurt?
A: The yogurt has a living culture.

OK, to be equally offensive to Jews, just to be fair:

Q. How was copper wire invented?
A. Once, two Jews grabbed the same penny...

The Henny Youngman of the South. Take my wife please.

SLAYERCHICK! I miss snipin your head !

and here was me thinking that Canada was a last baston of sanity in the developed world.........maybe i should re-consider moving over.

Originally posted by DATH 1) Why is the Afghan air force so easy to train? You only have to teach them how to take off! 2) What do you call a peice of sandpaper in Afghanistan? A map! 3) Failed Afghan recruitment slogans: Be Allah you can be! Martyrs have more fun! Free camoflage turbans! Sign up today! Uncle oSAMa wants you! (Now you know that was funny) 4) What do you call a guy with his hand up a camels ass? An Afghani mechanic! 5) Why don't they teach Drivers Ed. and Sex Ed. on the same day in the middle east? The camels would get too tired! 6) What's 20 feet long and wrapped around a c**t? A turban! 7) What should Iraq get for it's air defence system? A refund! 8) What do you get if you put 30 Iraqi women in a bomb shelter? A full set of teeth! 9) What's the difference between an Arab an ET? ET went home! 10) Have you seen the new Iraqi Flag? A white star on a white background! Q: What do female Muslims use for birth control? A: Their faces. [See photo above.] Q: What's the difference between a Muslim and a dead horse? A. It's no fun beating a dead horse. Q. What's the difference between an American BBQ and an Islamic BBQ? A. In America, Humans roast animals over a fire. In Islam, it's the other way around. Q. What do you say to a Muslim with his arm all the way up a camel's rump? A. "Having car trouble?" Q. What's the difference between Cindy Sheehan and a terrorist enemy? A. I don't know either. Q. What's the difference between Michael Moore and a one ton CARE package? A. Michael Moore, if sliced real thin, can feed a larger Afghan village. A Pakistani comes to America and begins working for the ACLU but is unfamiliar with American advances in toiletry. On his first day on the job he comes back from the men's room saying he can't find any hole in the ground. His boss explains how American plumbing works and sends the Pakistani back. A few minutes later, a loud, blood-curdling scream is heard from the bathroom. A few minutes after that, another loud scream shakes the office walls. His boss runs into the bathroom to investigate why he's screaming. mop bucketThe Pakistani replies, "I am just sitting here on the toilet like you instructed to do and every time I am making to flush, something comes up and squeezes dearly on my poor testicles." His boss looks at what he's sitting on and says, "You idiot. You're sitting on the mop bucket!" A Muslim father catches his son masturbating. He says, "Don't do that my son, or Allah will strike you blind." The child says, "Abu, I'm over here." Q: How do you get a Muslim woman pregnant? A: Dress her up as a goat. Did you hear the one about the Muslim who won a Nobel Prize in Mathematics? Neither did I. Q. How many muslims does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? A. What's toilet paper? Q. What do Muslim men do during foreplay? A. Tickle the goat under the chin. Here are a few tasteless jokes even al-Qaeda can appreciate: Q. How many Muslim extremists will it take to destroy America? A. None, American Liberals can do it all by themselves, thank you. Did you hear about the prostitute who came out of a bar and was stoned? She didn't survive. Did you hear about the greatest bash they ever had in Bali? Everyone was bombed. (this last one makes Bin Laden roll on the floor, piss in his robe, and kiss his goat)     Mohammed heard one of his wives was leaving him, so he rushed home where he found her on the carpet in front of the tent with her belongings; he sat beside her and said, “I heard you were planning to leave me?”     She replied, “Yes, I heard your other wives saying you were a pedophile!”     Mohammed thinks for a minute or so and then responds, “that's a mighty big word for a 6 year old." Q. What do you call a Muslim who owns a camel and a goat? A. Bisexual. Q. How do Muslims practice safe sex? A. They mark the camels that kick. Q. What do Tehran and Hiroshima have in common? A. Nothing, yet. Q. What do you call a Muslim who owns 6 goats? A. A pimp. Q. whats the difference between a truck full of dead Muslim babies and a truck full of bowling balls? A. The bowling bowls are hard to pick up with a pitchfork. Q: How do you tell a Sunni from a Shiite? A: The Sunnis are the ones with the Shiite blown out of them. Q. What's the hardest part about a Muslim killing his own daughter? A. Suppressing the erection. Q: How can you tell if a Muslim girl is old enough to marry? A: Make her stand in a barrel. If her chin is over the top, she's old enough. If it isn't, cut the barrel down until her chin is over the top. Q. What's the difference between a Muslim and a vampire? A. At some point the vampire will stop being bloodthirsty.     A Muslim walks into his local mosque with a big grin on his face.     "What are you so happy about, Abdul?" Asks the Imam.     "Well, I'll tell you," replies Abdul. "I live by the railroad tracks and on my way home last night, I noticed a young woman tied to the rails, like in the American movies. I cut her free and took her back to my humble abode. Allah be praised - we made love all night, all around the tent. We did everything, me on top, sometimes her on top, every position permitted by Mohammed, Peace Be Upon Him!"     "By the most Merciful," exclaimed the Imam, "you have been blessed. Was she as beautiful as a desert flower?"     Abdul grimaced, "By the Jinn, I do not know - I never found her head." Q. What's the difference between ET and Muslims? A. ET got the point and went home. I went to a Muslim birthday party last night. Damn if that wasn't the fastest game of Hot Potato I've ever seen! Q. Why are there only 2 pallbearers at a Muslim funeral? A. There's only 2 handles on a garbage can. Q. What do you say to a Pakistani at Christmas? A. A quart of milk, a loaf of bread and a pack of Marlboros please. Q. What do you call a bus with 2 Somalis falling off a cliff? A. A waste, you could have fit at least 50 in the bus! Q. What do you call a Muslim between two houses? A. Ali. Q. When's the only time you should wink at a Muslim? A. When aiming. NewsFlash Reports say the stench from the thousands of bodies in Pakistan is unbearable. Police report that it's likely to get worse now that there are dead ones. Q. What can Saudi Arabia do to raise the average IQ in the country? A. Allow Jews to come in.     A Russian, a Cuban, an Englishman and a Pakistani are on a train.     The Russian takes out a bottle of his best vodka, drinks a bit and throws the rest off the train and says, "There's plenty more of that where I come from."     Everyone is impressed. The Cuban takes out one of the finest Havana cigars, takes one puff and throws it off the train and says, "There's plenty more of those where I come from."     Again everyone is rather impressed. So the Englishman stands up and throws the Pakistani off the train. Q: Where do you find a Muslim with no legs? A: Right where you left him. Q: What's the difference between Dar al-islam and Dannon yogurt? A: The yogurt has a living culture. OK, to be equally offensive to Jews, just to be fair: Q. How was copper wire invented? A. Once, two Jews grabbed the same penny...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lwx2ce_AyOE